A Single Dad Life

Mothers' Day

2006-05-15T11:25:00.000-05:00

The kids were with their mom yesterday. Mothers' Day is a rather odd holiday for me. My money and time are spent to buy a present for the woman that spends little time with our children. Of course, the present is for the kids' sake. They deserve to have two parents that love them and that they can love back. The kids came back last night pretty happy, although that degenerated into bickering.

Been so long!

2006-04-30T14:14:00.000-05:00

I have been way busy! First, I began learning how to play cello. I've wanted to learn for about nine years. I bought a cello from these guys. I've learned a lot, but I'm not convinced, nor are my kids, that I have any real talent. Still, I have a good time playing.

I met a single mom of two cool boys. The mom and I have been spending a lot of time chatting, talking, etc. Unfortunately, she lives a long way away and moving my kids from their mom isn't without consquence. I've got a lot of planning to do.

Spam?

2005-09-11T19:46:00.000-05:00

I finally get my internet back up and check out my blog and immediately get two spam comments. WTF.

Internet back up

2005-09-11T16:54:00.000-05:00

My internet service was down for a couple months. Apparantly, I can't upgrade Windows 98 to SE without problems. I figured it out though.

Neopets

2005-07-05T16:48:00.000-05:00

At the bottom of my page is a link to Neopets. This site has been a time-burner for my daughter. She enjoys the boards, where fantasy role playing seems to be the theme. A couple of her friends from school are members and they can chat back and forth through the boards. I haven't found an actual chat function, which is fine by me. There are games where you can earn points and buy virtual gear. You can, of course, get your own smarmy little pets, hence the name: Neopets. The site has really been teaching my daughter about setting up pages and playing with HTML. Plus, she is learning to type and write. It's groovy. As far as I've seen it is a kid-safe site, but there are adults that have pages. So, as always, monitoring what your kids are doing on the net is a must.

Huffing

2005-06-28T05:16:00.000-05:00

Have you heard about huffing? Just when you thought you'd covered all the bases by discussing teen pregnancy, aids, glue-sniffing, dope, etc. Time to throw away all our aerosol cans.

Schools out

2005-06-11T06:43:00.000-05:00

The kids survived another year of school. On the last day of school, my daughter visited "Michigan Adventures" an amusement park. Her only regret for the day was not riding a scary ride sooner. She found that it was more fun than scary. The school took three buses filled with band and choir students and were supposed to arrive back at 9pm. At 9:50 it rolled into the school parking lot. My son and I waited for an hour, because we got there early. Gack!! The drive is about 2 1\2 hours long. Apparantly a few kids had too much to eat and drink and needed several stops along the way. You would think that the drivers would have planned for the stops, since this is an annual event.

My son, 11, and I did have some quality time, too. Not only did we sit in the car waiting for an hour with nothing to do, but talk, I also took him golfing in the afternoon. His last day was a half day at school and I was going to leave him at home while I worked. I had mixed feelings about leaving him on his own. He wasn't excited about it either. A co-worker said, "It's the last day of school. You should take him golfing." So, I did. We played 18 holes and got a cart. He has never played 18 and and it was his first time playing from a cart. I think he enjoyed the cart more than the golf.

He wanted to drive the cart and I let him a couple times. The course's liability insurance won't cover damages caused by someone driving a cart without a driver's license.

He had fun anyway. His lessons have really paid off, too. He hit the fairway more often than me and is really starting to get some distance, too. He aimed several good-natured "in your face" comments in my direction. He played well, but I still kicked his ass. I expect he will be kicking mine in a couple years, though.

Oh, both kids were promoted to the next grade. Whew!

Birthday Cake

2005-06-06T05:22:00.000-05:00

My son, 11, baked me a birthday cake at his mom's house. Chocolate with chocolate frosting and he even iced a "happy birthday dad" on it. Very tasty indeed. That was the first birthday cake I've received in three years, which was the last time my mom baked me a cake. He added candles, but refrained from rebaking the cake by not including a candle for each year of my life.

Which reminds me: I need to get my fire extinguisher recharged.

Support

2005-05-28T07:04:00.000-05:00

Being a single-dad with primary custody of two kids is expensive. For the past two years plus, I've footed almost all of the kids' expenses. Their mom worked a part-time job and didn't seem to make enough to pitch in. Now, she has a new full-time job and has money to pitch in, but wants to keep the friend of the court out of it. The friend of the court (FOC) orders and monitors child support and parenting time issues. She wants to negotiate every item of expense. She says it will be better for the kids. I wonder how that would be?

The FOC would tell her how much to pay every month and automatically withdraw that amount and pay it to me. No negotiating. Fewer opportunities to argue. Seems that would be better for the kids. She wants to buy a house and doesn't want her credit report to show that she owes child support. Getting a home loan is apparently a close run thing. She keeps bringing that up as if that is going to motivate me to forgo FOC. How is that better for the kids?

Beach

2005-05-04T19:56:00.000-05:00

I was lucky, I grew up on the beach. We lived on Lake Michigan from the time I was 5. I have spent more time alone on the beach than I did with human company. Ever wander out onto the ice of one of the big lakes? The ice is not flat like on a small lake, instead it has been developed by waves crashing against the shore and freezing and then the ice shelf moves further from shore as additional waves pound the shelf adding more weight. This leads to lots of lumps and bumps and even ice caves. Beautiful and amazing, but no skating on Lake Michigan.

During the spring you can wander the beach finding flotsam washed ashore. When I was a kid I often found aluminum fishing floats partially buried in the sand, but that type of fishing isn't done much on the Lake anymore. Bottles, logs, and even boards from sunken boats can be found on the beach in the spring. The Great Lakes have claimed the lives of thousands of sailors and finding a deck plank is a sobering experience.

During the summer, the water may warm up to 70 degrees (fahrenheit folks). As a kid, the water could be 60 and you'd still go swimming and spend nearly the whole day in the water. I told an acquaintance from Florida about swimming in 60 ish degree water and he said, "no way, you'd get hypothermia." I take my son to the beach now and I'll ask him if he's cold and he says, "no Dad", even though his lips are blue, he is covered in goose bumps and he is shivering. Then he runs back to the water before I tell him to stay out and warm up for awhile. My daughter is more sensible. No one I know died of hypothermia.

During the fall, the storms turn the Lake gray and the water churns with foam covered white caps as the waves slam against the beach. The wind whips around your clothes and you wonder how you could have spent so many days swimming in something so dark and angry. The beach is empty again of the summer tourists and it is all mine.

Time to golf

2005-04-29T06:02:00.000-05:00

Now that tax season is over it is time to golf. I've been golfing three times already, which is pretty good for Northern Michigan in April. We usually have snow on the ground. Well, we did have snow on the ground last weekend and rain showers in the forecast for this weekend. I'll have to golf during the week while it is sunny.

Who needs to work anyway? Hmmmm, I need a new roof for my house, or a wedge for my golf bag. What's it to be?

Tax season

2005-01-23T10:57:00.000-05:00

Tax season begins... This year my son hasn't gotten misty-eyed at the prospect of three plus months of his dad being busy all the time. Sundays, being the only day I don't work, puts a lot of pressure on doing something special on my rest day. Today, we're going to our local hobby shop and buy a new model for my son. We have a special set up in the basement where we can assemble models together. I still have a ship model to complete. What a great way to spend time. It's quiet and we chat the whole time. Meanwhile, my daughter will spend her time role-playing at Neopets, a kid safe web site.

Changing fatherhood

2005-01-17T06:30:00.000-05:00

Priorities are changing. The definition of american fatherhood is changing.

Monty Python

2005-01-10T22:07:00.000-05:00

Dear Sir,

My kids love Monty Python's Flying Circus and of course the "Search for the Holy Grail". We've been watching a DVD collection my friend John lent us. Tonight a skit about Chartered Accountants, Englands CPAs, played. My daughter laughed and laughed. She laughed way too loud and long for the daughter of a certified public accountant. The gist of the sketch being that accountancy is boring, boring, boring and Michael Palin's character, the CA, wants more adventure. Lion-taming is his new career choice. John Cleese's character, a career counselor, is skeptical. I object. Palin's character chose banking in the end. Banking is more boring than accounting.

Sincerely,

Chuck P. Annoyed

PS: Is it really necessary to use British humour?

Been awhile

2004-12-14T07:01:00.000-05:00

Been awhile since I've posted, which is so typical of me. Thanks Joanne for waking me up.

Dr. Phil's parenting book?

2004-09-30T05:39:00.000-05:00

I don't really know who Dr. Phil is. I don't watch Oprah and I haven't watched his show either. I might take a peak at his show to see how accurate the description of his media antics are in this article.

Pitiful

2004-09-14T05:16:00.000-05:00

An article by another Blogger joanneslife.blogspot.com, got me to thinking. She said she was in a store and trying to reach the top shelf for an item and a couple guys just walked by her without helping her. At first I thought, why didn't she ask? Then I thought, guys are ready to save a damsel in distress. Then I thought: I was just in a similar situation.

A couple weeks ago my daughter and I were grocery shopping. R said she needed "feminine care products". I'm reasonably up on how the female body works and what is happening that special time of the month, but I know bupkiss about the products. My daughter, at 13, is just learning about her "monthly visitor". There we are perusing the shelves of pads, tampons, etc and I'm stumped. She knew she wanted pads. That narrows the field down to 132 choices. You've got your maxi, maxi-thin, light days, heavy days, thin, blah-blah-blah. What do I know? I begin to pick up packages and ask, "What about these, sweetie?" "No, they have wings, dad" and "They're too thin, dad" "too thick" and so on. Meanwhile, I counted three women that just walked by without even glancing our way. Is this something that is seen everyday? Dad picking out pads? I would say it is seen less often than a shortie trying to reach the top shelf for a can of baked beans. I should have asked for help, but my daughter would have had an aneurysm on the spot.

T.V., adolescents and sex

2004-09-08T05:30:00.000-05:00

duh

and, been away for awhile. Summer time is kid time. We've been golfing, camping, etc. Fun times.

Golfing disaster

2004-07-18T12:02:00.000-05:00

I haven't been golfing for two weeks, because of a pulled muscle in my back. I really muscle the club around sometimes. Remember: Timing and excellerate through the ball releasing the club to hit the ball square. Gah!! Took the kids golfing today and my back was okay, but my son decided to have a meltdown on the second hole. Instead of allowing his behavior to piss me off, I just didn't let him play and he had to follow my daughter and me around the course. After a few holes I asked him if he wanted to play, but the little monster said no. He can get really cranky playing golf and yet he says he likes playing. I think it is more a brother and sister thing than a golf thing.

Who's easier to raise: boy v. girl?

2004-07-18T05:49:00.000-05:00

Another MSN article. I find the emphasis on "mom" and lack of references to "dad" in this article annoying. In any case, both of my kids offer challenges in raising them right. My daughter is sweet, but has turned shy and retiring. Big difference from just a year ago. Blame middle-school sniping by other girls. I'm trying to minimize that effect. My son, the sensitive guy, can be prickly and moody. I blame his mom...joke. Both make me laugh every day. I wouldn't say either is easier or harder to raise based on their gender. They are just different.

Russian Girl

2004-07-16T19:41:00.000-05:00

I'm a single-dad in a town that has few opportunities to seek out and find compatible women, I signed up in Yahoo personals. I haven't put a picture up and I haven't gotten a lot of hits. That's okay, because I'm still a little leery about getting involved with someone at this stage of the child-rearing game. However, I did get an unusual response from a woman in Russia! I wonder if it's for real. I have doubts, of course, but what could they possibly expect to get out of a fake personals contact? Am I naive? Anyway, I'm on guard, but I sent a reply and got another letter back a day later. It was an exceptionally long letter, full of details, and questions, but no questions regarding my wealth, ssn, or credit card number. Is that coming? I'm still on guard, but I just sent a letter back to her and we'll see where this goes. It is my understanding that Russians love their children. If she's real, then she's vivacious, beautiful(picture included in second letter) and family oriented. I wonder where a woman like that is closer to home? Anyone got an answer?

LeMonde soak your head in a pond

2004-07-16T14:15:00.000-05:00

Greg LeMonde, former Tour champion, is out of line and losing fans with his statements regarding Armstrong and doping. LeMonde was a great cyclist who biked when cycling was small in the states. Okay, so it is still small in the states, but Armstrong is making real "sports" money, which is something LeMonde didn't get. I've heard rumours that LeMonde was bitter. He has proven it. Come on Greg, pull your head out!

Teen sex

2004-07-11T08:10:00.000-05:00

As the father of a 13 y.o. daughter and 11 y.o. son, the topic of sex is being broached more and more often and usually by me. I don't want my kids growing up with a pornographic sense of what sex is, but I also don't want them growing up thinking sex is "dirty". I laid the groundwork several years ago on sex discussions with my kids by reading books on the reproductive system. Now, it's time to discuss the emotional apects of sex. We can't forget the dangers of unprotected sex or the dream/goal shattering effect of an unwanted, teenage pregnancy. Gahhh! Here is a general article by msnbc on teen sex. Not a bad attempt at bringing out the general issues related to discussing sex with your kids.

Hey ladies!

2004-07-06T07:43:00.000-05:00

If you're wondering whether dating a single dad is worthwhile check out this article. I can attest to being able to do the laundry and help the kids with homework.

Porn Blogs

2004-07-05T09:21:00.000-05:00

What's up with all the porn blogs on blogspot? I enjoy looking over blogs listed as "Recently Updated" and it seems that more and more of the blogs are porn related. I'm not a prude, but there is so much porn on the internet that it is becoming more and more kid unfriendly. A couple years ago my daughter used yahoo to look up "Pokemon" at her grandmother's house. She clicked on one of the sites and was rewarded with a hardcore porn site. That took a lot of explaining and resulted in installing a parental control software. I've had that software on my computer for a number of years and it isn't 100% effective, but it helps. What's a parent to do? I don't let the kids use the internet without me supervising. Is it censorship? No, it is responsible parenting. I want my kids to grow up with a healthy outlook toward sex and porn doesn't promote that outlook.

New clubs

2004-07-05T09:05:00.000-05:00

After five years of shopping for new golf clubs I bought a set last friday. I took them out for a spin on Saturday with my brother and played 18 holes. We walked the course in the sun. I slept well that night! The Blue Angels were performing their air show over East Bay and we were able to watch from the course. I love the clubs, Mizuno MX-23s. They replace my 16 year old, $86 clubs. I bought them from my friend Adam, at his Golf USA in Gaylord. Thanks Adam! I shaved 7 strokes off my score on the second nine. We'll see if I can break 90 on my next outing.

Parenting method #1

2004-07-04T10:17:00.000-05:00

My basic child rearing procedure is to punish the kids when they misbehave by embarassing them in the presence of their friends. I enhance the effectiveness of that punishment by acting like a damn idiot while in public with the kids. In that way they know I won't hesitate to act like an idiot at anytime. It works.

Gack!

2004-07-02T18:05:00.000-05:00

I told myself I wouldn't waste my time with Michael Moore any more, but this was an interesting article. Decidedly, less partisan than most articles.

Tour de France

2004-07-02T17:56:00.000-05:00

I enjoy the tour de france. I, like many people, may find france's politics annoying, but they host one of the most intriguing sporting events and they do it every year. As everyone knows, this is Lance's year to break the record for most wins. Here is an article that details who,when and what to watch for as the race progresses. As a cancer victim, my mom took a great interest in Lance's career and story. She was saddened by his divorce. She was joyous at his victory last July. My mom passed away last November after her battle with cancer was lost. Go Lance. The race starts tomorrow with the Prologue.

My mom's stuff

2004-06-27T05:22:00.000-05:00

Spent yesterday with two of my brothers and a sister-in-law and a niece moving the remainder of my mom's things to an auctioneer's garage. My mom passed away last November and it looks like we have her home sold. None of the kids felt compelled to buy her house. She moved into the house after her divorce from my dad. It was a good house with many happy memories, but it also held many sad memories. My mother died in that house after a two-year struggle with lung cancer. I don't hold that against the house. It wasn't Radon that caused the cancer, it was my mother's choice to continue smoking even after all the data showed that smoking caused cancer. I miss my mom.

Another Moore debunker

2004-06-24T17:51:00.000-05:00

A book is now available outlining Moore's lack of honesty and integrity. This book is certain to be on the reading lists of those that have bought "My Life" by Bill Clinton and by those salivating movie-goers waiting for a pg13 rating on "Farenheit 9/11". Oh, sorry, it is still going to be rated R, but Mikey would like those that are interested and are underage to go ahead and sneak into the theater.

Kids trying to yank dad's chain

2004-06-23T20:43:00.000-05:00

The kids were dropped off at work this afternoon by their mother. While goofing in my office they came across a memo and they noticed that it was initialed "KK". So, kids being little greasy, diseased monkeys, decided "KK" stood for "kiss-kiss". They began teasing me that I was getting love notes at work. I stayed quiet, smiling at them, and after a couple minutes asked them to follow me. I took them to "KK" and told her what the kids said "KK" stood for. My daughter's face turned a lovely shade of red. Karen said, "So, who wants a kiss," and my son bolted. Karen is a gamer, eh? Anyway, being able to turn the tables on your children is an essential skill that in raising nice, polite children. Obviously, I don't practice that skill often enough.

J.K. Rowlings to quit writing?

2004-06-22T12:56:00.000-05:00

According to this article, J.K. Rowlings of Harry Potter fame is finished writing. She won't complete the sixth book in the Potter series. Forget seven books as Rowling planned.

mikey moore and slate article

2004-06-22T07:57:00.000-05:00

Michael Moore and Farenheit 9/11 brought to task here.

Fathers' Day Golf

2004-06-20T17:38:00.000-05:00

The kids and I went golfing today. What a beautiful day. I golfed acceptably, but my 13 y.o. daughter played very well. The kids had lessons the past week for four mornings. Her swing is looking much better. My son's swing is a thing of beauty already. He needs to work on his course ettiquette. I love being able to go out and do things with the kids. Generally, it is grocery shopping or housework that we participate in together. Golf is expensive when you have to pay everybody's greens fees. So, we don't get to golf together as often as I'd like.

Clinton still allowed to pretend

2004-06-20T17:34:00.000-05:00

As if Clinton handled foreign policy with any postive effect. Only the simpering liberal news media of the major networks would continue foisting his pissant views upon the rest of us. A whole hour of Bill on 60 Minutes. Not on my T.V.

Fathers Day

2004-06-18T03:04:00.000-05:00

Oh, here's a great article on being a dad. I scored myself pretty well against this father's ideas of being a good father, but I have areas of improvement. Good stuff.

Fatherhood

2004-06-09T05:59:00.000-05:00

MSN has updated an article on fatherhood, specifically, single-fatherhood. Nothing new discussed, but it reinforces what I already know: Dads are capable and important in children's lives. A single-dad's life has similar challenges to a single-mother's life with one rather large exception: There is very little community understanding or support of single-dads. I still get the odd looks in grocery lines when explaining that, "no, I'm not filling the grocery list written by the mom." I haven't done that for nearly five years. Will that change as more and more households are headed by men? I guess it will, but that will be after my kids have their own families. In the meantime, single-dads need to spread the message that we're out here and we're competent.

What we need to do is come together and start our own support groups.

Movies I want to see

2004-06-08T22:33:00.000-05:00

Bourne Supremacy

Harry Potter

Shreck 2

I Robot

Opening game

2004-06-08T20:59:00.000-05:00

My son had his first baseball game of the season tonight. What started out as a game that was heading to a "mercy" loss ended up a pretty good game. We had some questionable pitching and catching the first two innings. The other team got a lot of stolen bases and stolen runs. Coach put in a new pitcher and the catcher improved and we came back to make it a competitive game. We still lost. But the boys left seeing that they would be in the hunt. We played the last season's league winner, but then, our team was second place last year. It's a hoot watching the kids play the game. Oh, btw, my son struck out both times at bat, but he swung at good pitches. We'll have to work on his hitting.

Harry Potter is Back

2004-06-04T19:18:00.000-05:00

My daughter learned to love reading due to the Harry Potter books. I read the first four books to the kids. My son frequently fell asleep during the readings, but my daughter was capitvated. When she was able, she read all four books over again. When the fifth came out we waited outside until midnight along with several hundred other people for the release of the book. What a hoot. My daugher read the book first and it took her less than a week to finish.

I still don't get the whole uproar over Harry and his pals and the "Christians" saying he's evil. This is an interesting article regarding the theological conundrum. No matter, we'll be going as soon as we are able even though the new Dumbledore doesn't appear to be as good Richard Harris and my daughter says Professor Lupin is completely wrong. The power of books, of course, is that they require the reader to participate in the story, whereas the movies only require the movie goer remain awake.

Quizzlet "What kinda Woman"

2004-06-02T18:20:00.000-05:00

School camp

2004-06-02T05:50:00.000-05:00

Both kids are doing expanded field trips this week. Yesterday, my daughter left for four days to an adventure camp with her classmates. This is one of those self-confidence building camps with ropes courses, etc. My son goes for an overnight to Mackinaw Island with his classmates today. Should be fun. I'm going golfing tonight!

New Link - Family Education

2004-05-31T07:43:00.000-05:00

I just put up a new parent link. The page covers many topics of interest. I'll preview several articles in the future.

Golf

2004-05-31T07:25:00.000-05:00

The kids and I went golfing yesterday before it started raining again. We had a great time. We only lost three balls, but I found one so we had a net loss of two. Damn good golfing if you ask me. I shot a 42, but the kids didn't want me to keep their score. That's cool. They get plenty of pressure to keep score in school. They've got their grades to keep. They've got their friends to tally up.

Concert

2004-05-30T06:24:00.000-05:00

My daughter's sixth grade band concert was Thursday. She wasn't nearly as nervous as usual. Nerves? She worried that people would be watching her and only her. I was only able to see her because I was in an upper row of the auditorium. She worried that she'd make a mistake. It's her first year playing, so of course she'll make a mistake. At least she doesn't play the clarinet, which squeek outrageously if you don't hold the reed quite right in your mouth. She plays the trombone, which isn't very girly, but she isn't very girly. But she did dress up in beautiful dress. She is beautiful. Makes me nervous.

Watching the kids play makes me wish I was able to play.

Argh!

2004-05-21T22:06:00.000-05:00

How much rain can we get? We get fewer days of sunshine than Seattle, but we don't have the supposed suicide rate. That's a bonus.

Follow this link to a "ReadyMade" article on how to appear smarter. Pass this along to family and friends as the easy to follow steps in this article should lead to success and happiness.

Huh?

2004-05-19T06:40:00.000-05:00

An interesting list of books recommended for reading by College Board.com.

Gee, too much dough? Let me try.

Golf today

2004-05-16T05:14:00.000-05:00

Unable to golf yesterday or mow the lawn. By the time the weather lightened up the kids got home. Tried to mow the lawn, but the mower wouldn't start. So, I read from Rebecca Blood's book on blogging and cooked dinner. So far I've learned the history of weblogs and what makes up a weblog. I'm fng at weblogging, if you couldn't tell. Rebecca's weblog can be found here.

She had an interesting link on involved v. uninvolved fathers and the affect on test taking of their children. My children should be little Einsteins...but they're not. Admittedly, my daughter is doing way better in school than I did at her age. I've been told, by a couple of women, that girls just do better in school. That just doesn't sound right, but apparently I'm out of touch as this article illustrates. I see that girls do better than boys in school in the U.S., the U.K., Canada and elsewhere. If girls are doing better in school than boys, which obviously runs contrary to my preconceived notion, why then don't they do better at the college entrance exams such as the SAT, MCAT, etc.? Why, the tests are gender biased of course. If girls do universally better in school work than boys then semi-logically they should do better at tests. This is the case in the U.K. where the tests are "girly" (sic)or biased towards girls. In the U.S. the tests are "manly" according to the National Center for Fair and Open Testing.

What does this mean to me? My 13 year-old daughter has dreamed of becoming a veterinarian since she was two years old. Getting into vet school is highly competitive and I'll be mighty angry if she fails to achieve her dream due to a standardized test that is biased against her gender. On the other hand, my underperforming son could benefit from a little help. And isn't that ironic? I'll have to ponder this issue on the golf course today.

Doonesbury

2004-05-15T11:00:00.000-05:00

Is Gary Trudeau's "Doonesbury" completely irrelevant yet? Back years ago, 25 to 30 years ago, his strips held some meaning and timeliness and even humor. Now, his strips are just tired and pointless and grotesque. Many cartoonists quit when they've run out of fresh material. Perhaps it's time for Trudeau to hang it up.

Cable t.v.

2004-05-14T23:07:00.000-05:00

I cancelled cable t.v. in November and didn't renew until a few weeks ago. We went without cable for five months. The kids didn't complain much at first (I'm a lying sack of shit). But they adapted, as did I, and we found other things to do. I always read anyway, but the kids started reading, too. They also started doing their homework first thing when we all got home. No arguments, because, gee, there wasn't much else to do anyway. Grades improved. We do have a vcr and a ps2, so we didn't go completely without electronic fun. Not to mention that we have the internet and computer games. I wish I could say we bonded more intensely (I vow not to be a lying sack of shit). At the end of April, I ordered cable so I could watch the Stanley Cup playoffs. The Wings were ejected in the second round. They need to rebuild. Amazingly, the kids have hardly watched any t.v. (you think I'm a lying sack of shit).

More rain

2004-05-14T21:52:00.000-05:00

We have been getting a shit load of rain. Northern Michigan weather bites. Three weeks of decent weather surrounded by rain or snow and cold. I exaggerate, minimally. Tomorrow, Saturday, is supposed to be sunny and bright and 50f degrees. I'm going golfing or maybe mow the lawn. Nah, I'll be going golfing. I bought a used driver three weeks ago and I need to unleash that beast. I've only had it to a driving range once! I hate this weather. How is it that the grass can grow so long without sunshine? Maybe I'll have to mow the lawn before I go golfing.

Night off

2004-05-14T03:54:00.000-05:00

A couple nights a week the kids stay with their mom. Having primary custody is a gas, but I'm glad I have a couple evenings to myself. Not that I've been storming the gates of the opposite sex, but I do get to watch hockey without listening to the kids complain. I don't have to listen to their bickering or the "Ed, Edd and Eddy's" hijinx on the tube. Wait a minute: I enjoy Ed, Edd and Eddy.

Baseball

2004-05-11T20:44:00.000-05:00

My son had baseball practice after school. This is a big year for him since his team will be facing a pitcher instead of a pitching machine. If you don't know: A machine pitches with consistant velocity and a human doesn't. Hitting is going to be more difficult this year and it is already apparent from watching practices. My son has played for three years now and his skills have really improved, but he still only tipped the ball foul a few times. The other guys didn't do much better. Luckily, the season doesn't start for another month. I love watching my boy play ball.

This is just the beginning

2004-05-10T07:23:00.000-05:00

Approximately five years ago I became a single-father. My children were 8 and 6 years old when their mom moved out and moved on. Coming from what was a typical family, I wasn't raised to raise kids. The census of 2000 found that nearly 16% of children under 18 living with one parent were living with their dad. In 1970, that percentage was 9%. As of 2000, single-dad households made up 12% of all households. Although dads as single parents is still significantly less than moms as single parents, the role of dads as single parents is increasing. This increase pales in comparison to the reality of the total increase in children raised without both parents in their home. In 2000, 26% of all children under 18 lived in a home with one parent compared to 12% in 1970. Many studies have been completed showing the effects this has on children, but my main concern is the effect it has on two children: mine.

Luckily, the kids' mom is still in their lives. She sees them a couple times a week and I think she does a better job of caring for them now than she did when she was around all the time. And "around" about sums up her involvement for the last couple of years of our marriage. If I thought it was painful living with someone as joyless as her, what did the kids think? They aren't talking. They love their mom and that is as it should be.