Support

Being a single-dad with primary custody of two kids is expensive. For the past two years plus, I've footed almost all of the kids' expenses. Their mom worked a part-time job and didn't seem to make enough to pitch in. Now, she has a new full-time job and has money to pitch in, but wants to keep the friend of the court out of it. The friend of the court (FOC) orders and monitors child support and parenting time issues. She wants to negotiate every item of expense. She says it will be better for the kids. I wonder how that would be?

The FOC would tell her how much to pay every month and automatically withdraw that amount and pay it to me. No negotiating. Fewer opportunities to argue. Seems that would be better for the kids. She wants to buy a house and doesn't want her credit report to show that she owes child support. Getting a home loan is apparently a close run thing. She keeps bringing that up as if that is going to motivate me to forgo FOC. How is that better for the kids?

Beach

I was lucky, I grew up on the beach. We lived on Lake Michigan from the time I was 5. I have spent more time alone on the beach than I did with human company. Ever wander out onto the ice of one of the big lakes? The ice is not flat like on a small lake, instead it has been developed by waves crashing against the shore and freezing and then the ice shelf moves further from shore as additional waves pound the shelf adding more weight. This leads to lots of lumps and bumps and even ice caves. Beautiful and amazing, but no skating on Lake Michigan.

During the spring you can wander the beach finding flotsam washed ashore. When I was a kid I often found aluminum fishing floats partially buried in the sand, but that type of fishing isn't done much on the Lake anymore. Bottles, logs, and even boards from sunken boats can be found on the beach in the spring. The Great Lakes have claimed the lives of thousands of sailors and finding a deck plank is a sobering experience.

During the summer, the water may warm up to 70 degrees (fahrenheit folks). As a kid, the water could be 60 and you'd still go swimming and spend nearly the whole day in the water. I told an acquaintance from Florida about swimming in 60 ish degree water and he said, "no way, you'd get hypothermia." I take my son to the beach now and I'll ask him if he's cold and he says, "no Dad", even though his lips are blue, he is covered in goose bumps and he is shivering. Then he runs back to the water before I tell him to stay out and warm up for awhile. My daughter is more sensible. No one I know died of hypothermia.

During the fall, the storms turn the Lake gray and the water churns with foam covered white caps as the waves slam against the beach. The wind whips around your clothes and you wonder how you could have spent so many days swimming in something so dark and angry. The beach is empty again of the summer tourists and it is all mine.